What makes a wedding tacky

If MOB hears that phone vibrate during her baby girl's vows, the offender will be glad looks can't kill. Champagne after the ceremony, copious toasting, high emotions, and a front-and-center dance floor can lead to quickly finding oneself on the wrong side of sober.

This tacky issue many times leads to the next, which is…. A best man nonchalantly mentioning he once dated the bride, but broke up with her giving his best bud the groom the green light to move in is absolutely not appropriate.

Subsequently using this as an excuse to take credit for the union is even more cringe-worthy. It did, but not nearly soon enough. Save FB Tweet More.

No one wants to be table nine , and we are seriously on to your plans. Overall, we get that it is your day to celebrate the love, the union, and beginning of your lives together, but it is really tacky to let your selfishness get in the way of these five things. No matter what, the people in your life want you to be happy , so why treat them so poorly in response to that?

Originally published on Thought Catalog. Feature image via on Allef Vinicius on Unsplash. Hi, thanks for these tips. This is really important. Also, I believe that it is important to immediately coordinate your actions with the photographer, and also decide whether or not he can take separate photos at the request of the guests. More often than not, it can lead to chaos if everyone wants to take a photo.

I think such issues should be resolved immediately with the wedding photographer , so that you have a clear plan for this day. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Send me Unwritten articles please! Apply market research to generate audience insights. Measure content performance. Develop and improve products. List of Partners vendors.

Planning a wedding is hard. Seriously, have you seen how long the to-do list is? And those are just tasks to check off. It might be hard to keep the good news to yourself, but remember to share it directly with your family and closest friends before you update your status on social media. Tell your parents first in person if you can , then your siblings and grandparents. Though you might want to put your phone on silent once all the good wishes start rolling in. A day or two later, remember to follow up with a post thanking everyone who has sent love your way.

Your wedding invitations are a way to let your guests know you love them and want them to be there to witness your wedding vows—not a place to ask for gifts. There are two acceptable and polite ways to spread the word about your registry:. The quickest way to make your guests feel forgotten is to leave a big gap in your timeline between the end of your ceremony and the beginning of the cocktail hour. If everything is in the same venue, time it so the bar opens and appetizers get passed as soon as your guests leave your ceremony site.

If a longer break is unavoidable say, between a late-morning ceremony and an evening reception , give your guests the option of being entertained. The wedding is a celebration of something much bigger :. Totally agree with this — just trying to feed people well, let them have fun, and show them the love! This is pretty helpful- I agree with the dress. We skipped on the wedding favors and a few other things and it was great.

So true! My favorite part is watching the ceremony and watching the bride and groom interact through the night the food and drinks are a plus! Whatever makes that couple happy will leave everyone smiling. Very interesting article. I think it depends on the person and every person has a different opinion. I think the music and drinks are something that people will remember about your wedding!!

I know that I always do! I have to agree with all of this! Love this list. I too am not surprised by all the negative comments but as I plan my wedding ALL of these keep ringing true for me.. Glad to have some reassurance that so many brides feel the same. Plus why do I want to pay extra for a bouquet some guests will toss 2 weeks later!? This is really informative post, thanks for sharing!!

Would like to implement this list in my wedding. My advice for couples planning a wedding on a budget. Think about what your family normally does for a family event like thanksgiving or Christmas etc. Thank YOU so much for confirming my thoughts!

I feel soooooo much better now and it really did alleviate the stress of things that you can let go of. The food, music, drinks, venue, etc. Well done and thank you for the much needed reminder. This list was helpful, especially for those brides who have a budget and are not quite sure to budget. While some may disagree, which looks like there are a few judging by the hilarious and ridiculous previous posts, there are ways to decrease costs of a wedding. There are always going to be people who disagree with your list and unfortunately they seem to think their opinion matters most.

Thank you for an insightful article. This article is crazy to me. I agree with the list. Times have changed. And I suggest people proof read before publishing their comments. Oh dear! Even my boyfriend would not agree with this list! It is ok if you are not the kind of person who is into the weeding sheboom and there you can have a lovely meal with your close friends.

Which is awesome. But if you want a wedding party then you need to pay attention to these little things! I even pay attention to these details when organising even the Christmas dinner let alone wedding! And ps. Who wouldnt care about the wedding dress? That is the one thing i am super excited about! Absolutely Love this list. We created a beautiful day for the two of us that about 50 others will watch and hopefully enjoy.

We are having it in our backyard, we uploaded a picture to Walgreens and printed invitations, and we had the most fun making centerpieces our of burlap and mason jars. Best wishes to everyone. I love this list.

Am amazed by the comments misunderstanding this. Do you actually get invited to things? This list also made me feel super chill, reading all of the irate comments about how everyone still dreams about their cakes years later haha. Yes it is all pretty but unnecessary. If you want to spend thousands on your invitations and programmes and flowers etc, go ahead!

Take it from me! I got married two weeks ago and did not sweat the small stuff in the slightest. Take a chill, complainers. I am coming up on our 50th wedding anniversary. Things were more basic. That is not to say my wedding was not considered elegant but things were more sensible then. I can testify to that having planned every detail of our 2 daughters weddings. Compared to my wedding the girls weddings were on steroids!

Both were beautiful and over the top! As I look back now…their dresses were very important to each of them which is all that was important! Both venues were special and still talked about. I admit the cake was overdone but beautiful but expensive.

We had no favors which I really see no need for. I am now planning our 50th wedding anniversary. A shaman will preside. All very simple but in its own way elegant. Big party to follow to welcome in the new year. What I want for me and family is to feel relaxed, have some great food and got to spend time connecting with old and new friends.

The guests are there to support and celebrate THEM! So what ever they choose is important, the guests should be there to support not gripe. If you are not going to care about what is important for the bride and groom then you should not go. The day should be about them. Yup so many haters out there! I guess depends on which ones you have opted in with your favours. Sweets usually works and a lot of people love them.

Even flowers! Flowers that we brides spend so much money with! Thank you, very helpful. She will have a beautiful wedding but just within our means. And Anna if you pay attention to all that when you attend a wedding are you really there for the couple? Ah, this makes me sad. Invite people who care about all things important to you, it makes your day so much more special and memorable and for years to come there will still be conversations about your beautiful dress, delicious cake and lovely details :.

You are you kidding? People I know care about all of this. Especially the favour bags. Uhm I love the bouquet toss!! And guess who really is getting married this time?! The wedding dress and the first dance is basically the number one thing dream about when I think of my wedding aside from the actual ceremony I love getting free candy at weddings. I would rather see my friend not stressed and wasting money than doing things they feel they have to cause everyone else does.

The dance , the flower toss make me cringe.. The cake as a celiac is never exciting. I just like to see the happy. Also working as a makeup artist has made me terrified of my wedding day as these people are often so stressed.

Are you kidding? The way I see all this is why even bother setting up an expensive and stressful party for people to be inapreciable. I believe to have a small intimate wedding of close family and special friends and use your money wisely in memories the newly weds can keep for the rest of their lives such as a great honeymoon.

No need to feed and preoccupy yourselves with a friend of a friends comment about your wedding. This day is ONLY for the two of you and not for guests. This is a crazy list! It is the whole wedding. The person who wrote this clearly only wants people to elope! Not to mention, your wedding is supposed to be about the bride and groom, not the guests, it is the one day that a normal woman gets to be a princess and a man gets to be a prince.

I can tell you that this is a rather accurate list and on the most part very true. My point is that the only one who really cares about some of these things is the bride herself. If she needs all the frilly invitations, fine linen tablecloths and napkins, a 23 tiered cake and a bunch of wedding favors that most people are never going to use in order to make herself feel like a Princess a broke princess but a princess none the less then have-at-it.

People will remember the entertainment, the ceremony and finally the food…spend the bulk of you budget on these things and you wedding will likely be a success. If you want to spend a tonne of cash on the little things then do so even though the majority of guests will not care about them months down the line. You basically thinks that nothing matters in a wedding. As I guest, I pain attention in everything! The quality of the paper and the size of the invitations tell me how elaborated will be the party.

Wedding with no flowers? Nobody pain attention on the tablecloths? A party is made of details! As a guest, I look at everything! I even touch the flowers to see if they are real!

And the bridal dress is just the most expected thing…. So many haters out there! Put your efforts into growing a life together. BTW — I liked the list. Ah, the modern wedding, where the ceremony must be kept short and your guests must be kept drunk. But at the same time, kind of makes me hold my friends and loved ones a little closer.

I have to say, i pretty much agree. I work as a waitress at an up class winery that hosts a lot of weddings, and I cannot tell you how many of those party favours we collect at the end of the night because no one bothered with them.

Us girls often get bunches of flowers because what else are they going to be used for? A couple other friends went to the rescue and made up an alternate playlist, but it took the party a little while to get going. Get good food that your friends and family will like, be nice to the staff and they will go out of their way to be helpful both as the couple, and a guest and try to work out ways for everyone not to get sloshed. My wedding was almost completely DIY. My awesome mother and I made ALL the flowers and centerpieces people were begging to take the centerpieces home.

My cousin gratefully made our cakes, my brother and mother did the music, and we wrote our vows. I completely agree with the list, except for the flowers!!!

All of these negative comments of what was suggested. As a mom of two young women in their twenties and will soon be having two weddings, I appreciate these thoughts. And seriously the invitations get thrown out!! NO ONE saves them!

Its a waste of paper so do a tree a favor and cut back on the invitation nonsense. Keep it simple. We get it. I never understood women who spent thousands on a dress. Whats the point? We will take bets at the classy beer pong table and proceeds benefit the sanctuary. It may look pretty for a few hours, but no one will remember what it looked like, their memories of what they did and who they saw is what they ALWAYS remember! Aww you poor bribes in the comment section! One thing may matter to an individual where that same thing may be on the bottom of the list for someone else.

I love details. Some others may not. I look forward to pretty invitations and well set tables. Everyone took an arrangement home. Our first dance was a song played on the piano by my husbands sister who has been playing piano for the past 12 years, so that was another unique thing we had that guests enjoyed.

Most the other stuff on this list, I do agree no one really cared about. It really depends on the venue and the type of wedding you have I think as far as how popular certain parts of the wedding will be honestly, every wedding is different. The last wedding we went to, the bride and groom spent 2 years on Pinterest planning every small detail. I saw the cake for a whole 5 minutes and never even knew what happened to it once they cut it and took it away.

There was too much food, although good, everyone was so full that no one touched the dessert bar and candy bar. Wedding favors? Tacky and insulting! As a wedding professional, I have one comment. The point a lot of people are missing is that brides tend to do things in a wedding to impress their guests.

For all the women disagreeing with this article, ask yourself, why did you do what you did at your wedding? Was it because you innately wanted to do it, or was it because you wanted to impress guests?

I am a guy, married for ten years, personally involved in 12 weddings, and been to at least 20 more. This list is spot on, if you are trying to impress someone. If you really want to do it because you really want to, go for it. If you, as the bride and groom, want these things, then by all means have them.

I, for one, toss your favor in the trash as soon as I get home unless I can eat it. What I DO remember is that we were shoved outside in the middle of August in Oklahoma for an hour while they reset the room and was miserable in the heat, the guest book because sadly nobody expected them to be together long enough for the advice to be taken, and that they ran out of food early. I love that this article has stirred up so much controversy. Hopefully it will make some folks question what they want.

I am getting married again at age 55, and my fiance is A dear friend just sent me a note that expressed the same sentiments. She has been happily married for 18 years and a very smart cookie. The whole point is to actually take the time to consider what really matters to you both. We have both waited a long time for a soulmate connection and he wants to shout it from the rooftops. People are coming from all over the country.

So, we are planning a very personal ceremony on a mountaintop followed by a kick butt reception at a really pretty and inexpensive rec center. When did it become so expected that a small fortune has to be sacrificed for this event? It feels a lot like the commercialization of Christmas. I think the party is for us AND our guests. Not everyone wants to diy their wedding, but I sure do.

It gives me joy and satisfaction. My dress is from a consignment store. It was the first and only dress I tried on. We used Vista Prints to make invitations using our photo for 39 cents a piece on a special sale! A friend has volunteered to coordinate for the day of…. And so on, and so on. We will spend on good food, music, drinks and photographer. I have no doubts that it will be an amazing day without breaking the bank. This list was good for a laugh. I especially enjoyed reading the part the guests apparently care about the ceremony.

In my experience the ceremony usually has less than half the amount of people that turn up at the reception which I find ao rude and insulting. I love this list! If you have the money to spare, go ahead and spend a fortune on all the elaborate details. But the problem is the standard is set so high for those who cannot afford it and go into debt for their wedding when in reality, it is only one night and what people will remember most is the love between the couple, and having a good time.

I agree with this list with the caveat that some things, especially the first dance, are for the couple not the guests. I may remember them but I toss it after the event. This list is somewhat right but i really do think that people notice the flowers and the cake. You should add lighting to set the mood — it is the one thing that can take a drab place and make it feel special. A good meal is also very appreciated does not have to be expensive just good. Some of the best meals I have had have been chicken, while one of the worst is lobster.

Some of these like the invitations and spending hundreds on flowers makes sense. Others the author just comes off overly cynical. Majority of people keep candles in their homes and they get expensive rather quickly. As a wedding planner I would have to say you missed the just entirely here. I have been planning weddings fit well over 8 years and can honestly say that you not only sound like a cheap skate, but someone who is really out of touch with what most people want.

My opinion always has been to never make a client feel bad about splurging on items that are a priority to them. Your article should preface the fact that this is your very bad opinion…in poor taste but very persuasive nonetheless.

Laughing over people getting so mad over this. Yep, no one cared about those months you spent planning gold tipped roses and a piece of paper in the post. We picked hydrangeas that morning to furnish the venue. It looked lovely. Mum made jams and chutneys for the favours — something that everyone could actually use. And she made the cake too — simple but made with love. Far more significant to me. What mattered to me was the food and the music and that everyone enjoyed themselves.

And everyone did exactly that. This list is not worth a look. Have the wedding of your dreams whatever way it may be! When my daughter got married on a budget I asked to decide what 3 things were most important to her. If she had wanted a carriage ride to or from the venue — fine.

But she had to decide. I want a great photographer because the pictures will last forever, we found one whose work we had seen and really liked.